Over the last couple of days, I have been careful about talking to relatives. I know which conversations are going to be the most difficult. And so today I finally called one of my uncles. He was the next youngest after my aunt. They were a team. I knew this would be hard for him. As my dad pointed out, my uncle is the most openly emotional of my dad and his siblings.
In the past when someone has died on my dad's side of the family, my aunt has written the obituary and I helped her edit. In talking to my uncle this morning, he said that they were hoping that I could write most of the obituary for my aunt. And every time I think about it, I just can't breathe. And when I can breathe again, I start to wonder how I'm ever going to make it through this all. Because the one person who always made things better in the past when I was faced with this kind of crap isn't here anymore.
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