Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Baby rollercoaster

There is still great potential for crankiness on my part. I don't think that I've mentioned it but over the last couple of weeks, I have developed some different sleep patterns. Usually I get home from work and talk to a few relatives. Sometime after dinner, I find myself dozing off in front of the TV. Most nights I'm asleep before the primetime viewing starts. Fortunately my fave shows are on my DVR recording list. I then find myself awake at some later hour. If I'm fortunate, it's around 11 p.m. like last night. Usually it's sometime between 1 a.m. and 3 a.m. though. Mind you, my alarm goes off around 5 a.m. When I awake in the wee hours, I am usually wide awake because at that point I have slept at least six hours. So what do I end up doing? Watching those shows I've taped. By the time my alarm goes off, I feel dead tired again. Yes, I know the answer is to not watch TV. And yes, I realize what my new sleep patterns are probably indicative of.

The Thrive! group closest to me meets on Tuesday evenings. I thought about this as I was dozing off yesterday evening. Maybe I'll make it there next week. And Kapgar, no, I have not have had that day of crying. Seems like I've been having to go non-stop lately. My next possible free day is Sunday. I have to attend a workshop on Saturday. *sigh*

I mistakenly thought that I was rid of Sports Guy. Then he called last night. I listened to the beginning of his message. (As I have been saving the messages, I have been tempted to do a post of transcripts of them.) He said, "I'm not sure if you want me to call or not." Not sure? I said that I didn't want to talk to him anymore last Thursday. I have not answered any of his calls since then nor have I returned any calls. What's not to understand? Yes, Gloria. Boys are stupid. Throw rocks at them.

Queenie told me yesterday at work that we need to talk -- outside of work. My guess is it has something to do with Monday's post. Now remember folks. I usually write posts at least a day in advance so that I have time to think about whether I really want to post it. There are quite a few posts that still remain classified as drafts. I keep them so that I can re-read them. There is always a chance that I will post them someday. Once it's posted, I don't have any regrets. Usually the post contains not only things that I may have already articulated but things that I would gladly say aloud. The only difference is that in a post I have had the opportunity to think about my words rather than thinking off the cuff. In younger days, I was a huge fan of writing letters for precisely this reason. Or at the very least making a list of notes for reference during conversation. Because how many times have you walked away from a conversation and thought, "I really meant to say this as well. How could I have forgotten that point?"

So I'm willing to have a conversation. I just have more pressing things on my mind at this time and so it is not a priority for me. Like fighting the feeling of crawling into bed and pulling the comforter over my head and staying there for an entire day -- or two.

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