Fences

Note: As you know, I usually like to write my posts at least a day in advance so that I can let them marinate. You know. Give myself some time to think about whether I want to post it. This is one of those kind of posts that made me debate about whether I was really meant to share it. Probably because I haven't written anything like this in a really long time. And there was a time when I did all the time. As you can see, I decided to throw caution to the wind.

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I grew up watching too many movies and TV shows from the 50s and 60s. They often made references to fences of a certain type. But they didn't exist in my neighborhood. And so, whenever I passed this fence, I would think to myself, "One day I need to take a photo." Once I had the photo, a number of thoughts started to take over my mind so much so that I just knew that I had to write them down. Because it's been a long time since I've been flooded with thoughts in this way. I figured that the universe was trying to tell me something.



When I was a kid, I dreamed of white picket fences,
and that my mother would sign up to be room mother and would bake cookies and cupcakes,
and that my parents would give me a horse for my birthday,
or maybe a brother or sister,
and that maybe one day I wouldn't be picked last for kickball.

Then I got a little older and I dreamed of a car instead of a horse,
and while listening to Janis Ian, of the day in which others would beg for my company only so that I could turn them down,
and that I wouldn't have to turn up the TV to drown out the sounds of my parents fighting,
and that I wouldn't feel so alone.

Then I grew up and found out that often life does not work out the way that you hoped it would,
or at least that's what they told me,
and I chose to believe it,
so I stopped dreaming (and creating),
but then one day I realized that I felt like something inside of me had died.

So then I started to try to dream again.
It was slow at first after many years of not daring,
but then one day I woke up
and started to believe that anything was possible once more.

And so now I dream again,
knowing that there's still a chance one of those dreams could come true.
Maybe even picket fences.